So sorry for the rant during my reappearance here the other day. Was in a very bad headspace. It was so crowded in there I couldn't even breathe. But whatever.

Today is somewhat better headspace. In fact, I woke up yesterday morning (following having written that diatribe against those I must call "family") in a suprisingly better mood. I guess this journaling thing can be positive for venting frustrations. My biggest problem is that I usually never let anything go; hence, what I write, normally just stays an issue....it never resolves itself into ancient history. Current events, all the way. I have so got to learn to let things go.

That being said, my stupid diaryland is up for renewal, yet again. Andrew, I swear, must be taking advantage of my decreased mental clarity, because it seems like I am constantly sending him money. I was gonna let this thing die a slow death and not renew, but now, I'm not thinking in that direction, so much. I think I will renew, though Lord knows I don't post here as often as I should. But it is nice to have rent paid up on a little space in case I need a place to crawl into and hide. I used to use my toy box for that as a kid, but if I even still had the damn thing I couldn't fit in it. My ass is a lot bigger these days.

In fact, my ass has grown by twentysomething pounds over the last two months, and boy am I not happy about that. Today, my friends, I am starting WW all over again, counting points and being true to me. I have to. None of my fucking pants fit. Except one pair of jeans.

Jeans which I just found out I cannot wear to class on Thursday evenings. I can wear them on Tuesdays, fuck I can even wear them on Mondayfridaywednesday too. But not on Thursdays. Apparently, they passed a law here locally that forbids the wearing of jeans by women on Thursdays. Either that, or they don't want me mistaken for an inmate at the local prison. Which is where the class is.

Yeah right. Like prisoners walk around carrying Dooney bags with matching Dooney wallet. "I've got the IT bag, be my bitch!" Somehow, I think that that would fail to impress the residents, don't you?

But whatevah. I digress.

Digress from what, I don't know. I had no point and was going nowhere with all this. Typical drunken ramblings of a teetotaler. Such a gemini.

Anywho, did I tell you all that so far I've scored....err...EARNED....all A's in the classes I've had? I did? Well hell, then it's no suprise. Am I proud? Do I brag it up, in here, where no one is listening? Fuck yes, I do, and I shall. Because, folks, whilst I know that in my younger daze I was most capable of easily earning said A's, if I simply applied myself, these daze, it's not so simple. I'm almost 4x10 and well, these stressed out brain cells aren't as absorbant as they used to be, especially when their external environment is heavily polluted with bullshit. So, in spite of life's little curveballs, so far I am batting 1000.

GO ME.

Go directly to the nearest mental health professional, missy, because you my friend are now in way, way, way over your head with 19 stupid units. Or was that eunuchs? Hmm, one man who can't service me is one too many. What the hell would I do with 18 more? But again, I digress, regress, distress.

I'm seriously starting to sweat the workload I have placed on myself, especially in light of the fact that Mr. Gimpy may be having yet another surgery in the next few months. As long as his stupid leg wound won't heal, I am safe. As soon as that beeotch scabs over and quits weeping, we're on our way to the men with the knives again. But hell, I made it work then, I can make it work now. I am so into my own personal slogans right now. My slogan of the week is: "Do NOT tell me what I cannot do." That little ditty goes out to all those school administrators who keep telling me I can't do thisthatortheother, lest I fail. Bite me.

So here's the fall line up. Batting order as follows, with a brief bio on each. You tell me what you think...did I bite off more than I can chew, or, am I wise in immersing myself in other things to think about, thereby limiting my available time to sink into the mental quagmire that is my true gemini self.....

1. American Popular Music - This course presents an introduction to history and literature of the popular music movement in the United States; it is a study of the relationships of popular music to the social history of America. Emphasis is on styles and personalities of folk, blues, jazz, Broadway, country, and rock. This course is designed for the non-music major.

I'm thinking it's mostly listening and comparison, along with minimal note taking. Hell, there's no textbook and no required purchases related to the class. How hard can this be? I may not know the origins and developed history of these things, but I know the difference between the types, etc.... My best guess: Class should be a cakewalk.

2. History 17B - The second half of my previous history course. This course is a continuation of HIST-17A from the end of the Reconstruction Period in 1877 to the present. It examines our national, state, and local history and government from the late 19th century to the present. The course covers the social, political, economic, and constitutional development of the nation.

Internet course. I have the book. Same instructor. I know how to work it to get the grade I need. Not too difficult. Best guess: Not a cakewalk, but not too demanding. One chapter reading, review the powerpoint online, write a 300 word essay, take quiz each week. Once a month, a 4 chapter exam. I know exactly whats expected. No suprises.

3. Psyc 1A - PSYC-01A is a survey course designed to provide introduction to facts and theories underlying human behavior. Special emphasis is given to the following topics: schools of psychology, physiological factors, sensation, perception, motivation, learning, thinking, emotion, abnormal behavior, personality, heredity, environment, and social factors.

Another online course. Instructor, text, and workload unfamiliar. Have had previous contact with instructor via email, and I would say borderline weenie. Chapters are about 40 pages long - that's a bit o'reading. Lots of concepts to cover, etc. My best guess: This will be one of the hardest classes. Will require much work. No term paper though - thank God.

4. PE Yoga - just go, yogaize, get grade. Go, do, participate. Get grade. Not too hard.

5. Intro into Computer Tech and studies - required to graduate. This is an entry-level course for non-computer studies majors who wish to become computer literate. Students will learn fundamental computer terminology and operations along with a survey of major computer applications in business, education, science, and the humanities. Students will discuss the social and legal implications of these uses. There will also be hands-on computer experience to familiarize students with word processing, spreadsheet, and data base applications.

Ok, basic Windows, Word, Excell, and Access, combined with ethical, moral and legal considerations. Really, I mean come on, a weekly discussion, and hands on practice using stuff I use everyday. Best guess: Cakewalk.

6. Criminal Law - This course covers historical development, philosophy of law and constitutional provisions; definitions, classifications of crimes and their applications to the system of administration of justice; legal research, review of case law, and methodology, and concepts of law as a social force. The course also explores crimes against persons, property, and the state as a social, religious, and historical ideology.

Could be intense. Unknown on the term paper aspect. I expect it will be a lot of work. Best guess: Moderately hard. If I just apply myself, it should be good.

7. Criminal Procedures: This course covers the legal processes from pre-arrest through trial, sentencing, and correctional procedures; a review of the history of case and common law; conceptual interpretations of law as reflected in court decisions; a study of case law methodology and case research as the decisions impact upon the procedures of the justice system.

This class kind of goes hand in hand with the previously listed one, and I am hoping that the topics of study directly compliment each other on the same timeline, which will help make it simple. It's being taught by our county District Attorney, who I hope and pray, doesn't make us go into too much case law. Probable term paper, or at least a bunch of papers on case law. Bleh. Lot of work, should be ok though.

So there it is. Am I doomed, or can I do it?

You make the call.