I woke up this morining fresh from a dream. I dreamed it was Wednesday (which it is) and that someone had called and was leaving a message on our answering machine. The someone was my boss, boss #1, and she was saying she needed someone to work Overtime tonight, 7-midnight. I was screaming at the machine, "No No Nooooo" over and over, and then, I woke up.

Slowly making my way to the kitchen, where said answering machine sits, I finally looked over at the foul device only to discover that all of this was a dream, truly. No new messages. Thank you God.

I've had the whole month of August off on vacation. I go back to work on Friday. All I am asking is for these last two days, of peace and quiet. Leave me be. I did not get done all that I wanted to do, largely because of my depression. However, I did get done quite a bit of stuff, and the few remaining "urgent" tasks I have outlined need to be completed in the next couple of days.

We are still waiting to hear from the Doctors on when the next surgery is. I suspect it's going to be right after labor day. That would be my guess. It really doesn't matter, it's going to happen and we both will deal with it.

I just wish I could get him to go talk to the shrink again. He has gotten so wishy-washy, and mean, again. He lashes out at everyone. He's turned into a real pig beast, or rather a boar (and yes, I meant bore too.) Hence, my inability to communicate with him with any modicum of maturity, and my total inability to comprehend his reactions to things at times, leave me mentally and physically exhausted, which in turn usually leads me down the road of depression.

Yesterday was exceptionally bad. I was so depressed following his several hundred dollar dental appointment, that we ended up getting our local equivalent of DairyQueen for lunch. We sinned big time. And my gallbladder let me know, in no uncertain terms, that it hated me and wished me dead. The attitude coming from the foul organ continued for the next 14 hours. So I was a miserable, nasty mean wreck last night. Today, I have woken up in a bit of better head space. But now I feel drained and worn out, like a chamois freshly used and wrung out.

Maybe going back to work will be good for me. It will get me away from him. Which is what I desperately need right now.